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Category Archives: Lunch
Gluten Free Kale Salad with Roasted Butternut Squash and Polenta Croutons
Those ten words basically define the term rich white girl. I’m definitely two of those things, and to be the third, throw a couple dollars my way, peeps. (I accept AMEX).
But seriously…. how f*cking trendy can I get? Truth: I actually like kale (said no one ever). And squash tastes as close to a potato without being a Fatty McFatpants salad topping. And gluten free croutons (that are actually just as bad for you as the real thing). Sign. Me. Up. This is an easy weeknight meal that can be served with or without meat. Also—I thought of this meal this morning and thought I was a genius for creating a delish meatless Monday meal. Turns out, it’s Tuesday. I’ve got to stop drinking.
Anyways, this salad it the ( . Y . )s. Make it before it gets way too hot to eat roasted squash. It’s freezing in Midland today (61 degrees), so roasted veggies didn’t seem so asinine.
Ingredients for salad
- 2 bunches of lacinato kale, stalks removed, chiffonaded (pretty sure that’s not a word)
- ½ butternut squash, cubed
- ½ tube of polenta (you’ve seen it before in the pasta aisle), cubed
- 1 tbs. olive oil, mixed with juice of half a lemon
- 10 leaves Fresh basil, chiffonaded
- 1 tbs. safflower oil
Ingredients for the dressing
- 2 tbs. olive oil
- 2 tbs. water
- 1 tbs. miso paste
- 1 tbs. Dijon mustard
- 1 tsp. agave (sup trendy)
- Fresh black pepper to taste
- 2 cloves garlic
Heat oven to 400 degrees. Toss butternut squash with a small amount of olive oil and salt and pepper, and roast for 30-40 minutes until tender and a little golden—making sure to stir during cooking. While the squash roasts, heat a nonstick skillet with tbs. safflower oil (has a high smoke point, use olive if you don’t have it!) Once the oil starts to shimmer, add in the cubed polenta and sauté until crispy (you will have to judge this by sight—all pans/temps cook differently!) Mine were about 4 minutes per side. Also, burned the shit out of my arms/face (or maybe covering up for the fact that I have acne and a rash?…) so use a splatter screen. For the dressing, blend everything together. For a thicker dressing, use less water.
This salad basically rules. If you legitimately will not eat kale (plebeians), use spinach or another dark green. Enjoy!
P.S. Spellcheck had a hayday with figuring out what I meant by ( . Y . )s. YES.
A few weeks ago, one of my besties came over for “just a glass of wine.” I have learned, in the past year living in West Texas, that “just a glass” means “just a bottle.” Per person. Well, since we always snack when we drink (boozing justifies eating), she brought over a snack. It was a hodge podge of ingredients that she had in the fridge, but it was tastyyyy. She made a cous-cous with tomatoes, lemon juice and thyme. We actually didn’t eat it that night, but it was refreshing and delightful the next afternoon. I’ve adapted it here to be a little healthier (quinoa vs cous-cous). It cures a hangover and works great as a lunch dish!
- Quinoa (however much you want). At HEB in Midland, they actually sell frozen cooked quinoa, which has no added ingredients, so I bought that in order to save a pan
- 1 package of cherub tomatoes, roasted. (cut them in half, drizzle a little olive oil, s&p, and roast on 225 degrees for 3.5 hours). Do this in advance, obviously
- 5-6 sprigs of thyme, remove leaves from stem and chop roughly
- 1.5 tbs olive oil
- juice of 1 lemon
- 3 cloves of garlic, minced
Literally, just combine all the ingredients. You cannot mess this up. Add any veggies or herbs you have that you need to use up.
I still cannot recall where we ate dinner last night…prob Whataburger.
I am literally sitting in front of the TV with my laptop trying not to throw up. Is there anything worse beside male hormone commercials? I’m currently watching a commercial for Axiron (the sick ass testosterone loaded deodorant for men), and grossed out by them filming a dad taking his daughter to college. Like how sicked out would you be if your pops got a boner while he was unloading your freshman year wardrobe. BARF. Side note—Cialis totally has it wrong—if you took an ED pill, wouldn’t you be in the same bathtub as your significant other? I guess old people do it differently? I’m confused.
ANYWAYS. I sat down to give y’all two super easy recipes that I made today. I a bunch of veggies in the fridge that won’t be good after the weekend, and we have a bday party tomorrow, so I’m donesky with cooking for the week after tonight. The things I have are….
- Grape tomatoes
- Mozzarella-block not shreds
- Jalapeños (from my garden that I picked b/c they were ripe)
- Red bell peppers (also from my garden)
So, we are making a pasta salad that actually gets better after a day, and a roasted poblano avocado salsa.
For the pasta, get a big bowl and put about ¼ cup of olive oil at the bottom, as well as 1 cup of black olives with some of the juice. I don’t like olives very much, but the olives in this give a ton of flavor and are easy to avoid. Add in 3 cloves of minced garlic, sliced grape tomatoes, chopped basil and chopped arugula. Cube up some mozzarella cheese-cut it yourself, don’t use shreds—it makes a difference. Add in whatever cooked pasta you want. For this one, I used quinoa pasta because I’ve had it in my pantry for a while. It tastes fine, but really the best is just good ole’ fashioned white penne. Salt and pepper to taste. I make this at night, and then serve with salad or sandys for lunch the next day.
For the roasted poblano salsa but the following in your blender—3 jalapeños (2 without seeds, 1 with seeds), juice of 1 lime, 3 cloves garlic, ¼ cup chopped green onion, 2 avocados, and 3 roasted poblanos. Add a generous amount of salt. I would start with about 2 tbs of olive oil and ¼ cup of water as well. Blend it all together. If you want it thinner, add water and blend until you have the consistency you want.
That’s it for tonight. And now the Erectile Dysfunction commercial with the grown man wearing a baseball jersey is on. Here’s a hint, buddy. Stop dressing like a little leaguer and maybe your wife will take off her mock turtleneck. I just don’t understand old people.